As proof of my credentials as an erotica author, I now offer: actual pornography.
I thought a bit about whether or not this was a good introduction to the characters involved, but it’s probably about as perfect as I could ever do.
Gavin Statzis just met Cho-rong Park, and he’s crazier about her than any other person he’s ever met. Both of them have secrets, though, secrets that come to bear when Cho bares her true face.
Content Warnings: monsters, mentions of non-consent, violence. By reading this piece you are agreeing to view this type of content. Message me if you feel there are warnings I missed; messages telling me about what a shit I am for writing it will be deleted.
I’m a refugee from tumblr so this warning is just as much for my peace of mind as yours, ha ha.
The tags for this are destroying me…
Gav normally isn’t like this. Normally he’s a lot more cautious, a lot slower. Bit of a dweeb, not that anyone ever thinks that looking up at him then realizing just how far back they had to crane their heads to meet his eye.
Cho-rong, though… they met about a week and a half back. Some ex-boyfriend was keying her car and Gav saw her screaming and tearing at her hair, saw the guy going to town on the doors. Now Gav didn’t absorb nearly enough from his parents, if you asked them (probably), but he did learn enough, so once he’d ascertained the situation he marched up and bounced the man’s head off the hood of Cho’s car a few times.
Not too many. Not, like, a permanent, irrevocable brain damage number of times. Still, now that the adrenaline and chivalrous testosterone high has worn off, Gav can see that perhaps he was a little over-the-top. Not as over-the-top as Cho’s ex-boyfriend was, though. What with Gav tossing him over the top of the car after he was done hitting his head into the hood.
After they got out of the police station, Cho took him to get coffee. She offered to suck his dick in the parking lot. Gav, being who he was–a dweeb–sputtered out ‘maybe a movie instead?’ and Cho laughed at him and he got all red. But the next day, they went and saw Blair Witch anyway.
He has the feeling he’s held out a lot longer than most of Cho’s marks. Not that she’s made it anything but easy. Since they started hanging out every day–Gav works nights and Cho don’t have a steady job–he has been shot at twice. He met a real life member of the real life Korean mafia and delivered some real life class one narcotics for him, even though Cho said they were just going to Dairy Queen. There might be a warrant out for his arrest but he ran fast enough that he can’t be sure the feds got a good read on him.
All this in just a week and a half, and somehow, Gav has found himself back at his trailer after work, shirt on his lamp, yanking his belt off while Cho wriggles naked beneath him. He’s normally not like this! Normally too much of a dweeb with too much of a self-preservation instinct to fuck girls whose boyfriends he’s assaulted.
Something about Cho-rong, though, something about her is magnetic. He’s no stranger to animal magnetism, but usually he’s the one drawing people in. He’s gotten pretty good at resisting, because for some reason the only kinds of girls and boys that wanna fuck him think that just because he’s covered in tattoos and has arms like a column of watermelons, he’s some kind of a criminal. He thinks Cho-rong might be the same.
But he can’t hold out anymore. She’s the only thing he’s been thinking of. His masturbatory habits, as Jesus-scandalizing as they were before, have reached Sodom and Gomorrah levels of Biblical inappropriateness. Manners? What are those? He’s been reduced to a slack-jawed thug in Cho’s presence.
Every time she talks to him he stares at her mouth, imagines her lips wrapped around his cock, red and wet from sliding up and down the whole length. She’s always licking her lips. He thinks it’s on purpose. He’s been missing vital conversation elements thinking about it.
When she breathes, he watches her tits under her shirt and imagines sucking them until her nipples are red and peaked against his tongue. She has the biggest tits he’s ever seen on a Korean girl, probably on account of all the toaster strudels and big gulps full of sweet tea. Not enough to fill his hands, but whose are? And they’re real. God, he needs to feel them, but until tonight, he’d sat on his hands and fumed.
Now he can have her, but instead of relishing every second of it, he’s seventeen and desperate again, so hungry for her pussy he’s practically drooling. Every fantasy of taking her nice and slow has shattered and the sad reality has taken their place. Look at yourself, Gavin Statzis. You’re a fucking mess.
Cho’s laughing at him, not out loud but behind her eyes, and he doesn’t even care. He’s too busy trying not to catch his boner in the fly of his jeans, trying to remember how to put a condom on.
Pinch the tip, right? He has a fucking condom, right? His brain is so scattered and hazed with lust that he doesn’t know up from down. Does he have a condom? Does he even really need a condom? Pulling out works. He thinks.
He’s gonna ask her if she has a condom, but as he tries to remember how to make his mouth do something besides pant, she wraps cool fingers around his cock and tugs, gestures for him to come forward with her other hand. Like a dog on a leash, he follows, even though he has to arch his back uncomfortably to bring their lips together.
The kiss has barely gone on at all before she bites his lip, snickers as he jerks back.
“We can kiss any time, Gavin,” she chides. He loves the way she says his name, all the sudden, the way the ‘v’ shades into a ‘b’ on her tongue. He loves the way her lips curl around the syllables. Aw, man, he’s a fucking mess. “You look like you need it now…”
“Nnyghfuck’s sake, Cho,” he insightfully agrees.
He reaches between them, holds his cock steady to guide it in. Even with his lackluster foreplay–er, well, he’d call it lackluster if he had, in fact, engaged in any foreplay–she’s dripping wet, electrifyingly hot against his knuckles.
He’d dreamed about working his fingers into this pussy, teasing the lips he bullies between here in meatspace. If he was the Gavin of his dreams, instead of a dumbfuck, he’d be taking the time to enjoy how plump and puffy they are, the slick beading on them, the way dusky skin turns red at the rim of her hole.
Nope, none of that. Just a few harsh thrusts to get himself seated. He cares about the way she winces at the size, the sudden intrusion, but not enough to do anything about it. Besides, after a second or so she melts around him, relaxes beneath him.
She smiles up at him, eyes a little misty, and Gav feels his stupid heart twist, feels his cock try to jump even though she’s tight and snug around it. Aw damn. Aw, goddamn. She’s got him good. He done caught feelings bad, huh? And after just a week and a half!
It’s honestly the best sex he can remember having. Cho takes him so good, soft thighs tight around his waist, clinging to his shoulders and wailing her head off. Gav grips her to his chest with one arm, braces himself on the other, and fucks into her like his life depends on it. Feels like it does. Feels like if he can’t fuck her, can’t cum in her, he’s gonna die.
She bites him, hard, and instead of flinching or stopping or whatever normal people might do, he just jerks her back by the hair and keeps going. It’s a hard angle to catch sight of her face from, but what he sees is glowering and furious.
“Uh, what the fuck, Cho?”
She spits up at him. He dodges out of the way, used to projectiles and especially angry spit. Wherever it lands, he hears it sizzle.
This breaks the spell right away. He tries to shuffle back and escape, but Cho’s legs get tight around the small of his back. That’s–that’s not right. She shouldn’t be able to do that! He’s a big dude, he works out every day, and she mostly sits around on her butt and smokes weed.
He can’t break free, and now she’s laughing really, really loud. Covering her mouth with her fingers curled into claws, eyes accusatory and contemptuous.
Dammit. He knew he wasn’t normally like this! So at least he has that, he tells himself, as Cho-rong starts to crack apart right before his eyes, turning from a sweet, soft Korean girl into… into…
He wants to say mantis? It’s not right, not exactly, but right now it’s the best he can do. Some sort of huge, snowy white bug, edges of the chiton plates tinged pink. The body shape is right, too, a whole buncha spiny legs fixed on his body and two arms where human shoulders would be. She still has titties, her neck and torso are still very human-shaped, but this is definitely a bug, no mistake about it.
Although her body is changed, he’s still rammed balls deep into her. That’s kind of funny. Gav has always looked for the little bits of humor in terrible situations because it keeps him marginally sane.
Those huge bug eyes focus on him, and a jarring, skittery laugh bubbles from between twitching mouthparts.
“Still wanna fuck me, Gavin?” Cho-rong hisses, voice full of malignant glee.
Gav glances down at his cock and the orifice it’s lodged in.
“Well, uh, looks like I’m still up? Probably the adrenaline,” he says. “If, uh, if you’re still downsies?”
Somehow, she blinks, and this conveys bewilderment and fury at the same time, though her face doesn’t shift. She brings those mantis hands up, about to strike. They’re tipped with wicked hooks, like the kind you catch fish on, or the kind fish have when they’re aiming to rip flesh. They’re pink, which, well, nice touch, he guesses, as she lashes out at him.
They bounce off his shoulders and back with a painful-sounding crack.
Cho shrieks, her voice both human and something else, rage and fear. This would be about the time for Gav’s dick to shrink, if he was a good or normal person. Well, you win some, you lose some.
He shoves her back against his mattress with both hands on her shoulders. Cho scratches at his side with her many legs, but they don’t even scratch. Nothing ever does.
And he isn’t gonna give her the chance to shock him with super-strength, not again. He’s been half-asleep the entire time they’ve known each other, but now he’s wide awake.
He can smell the forest and the rain, the animal stink, that is just a part of who he is. Cho must smell it too. She goes shock still, then shrinks back as well as she can, withering for just a bit before re-steeling her composure.
“Cho, were you gonna try and kill me?” Gav asks, though the answer is obvious.
Cho wiggles, and Gav has to bit his lower lip hard to get himself to stop from rolling his hips, stop from losing focus on the fact that she’s a murderous devil-bug and not hot and tight as she was before. She brings one of her hooked forearms to her mouth and grooms it, paying special attention to where one of the hooks has snapped off. Her blood is black and tarry.
“I…” She looks up at him, doing her best to give him doe eyes despite being a bug. “I was… just playing with you!”
Gav lets her come to the realization that she hasn’t convinced him at all by herself. Now she pulls one of her antennae down and grooms it too. She’s starting to look very nervous.
“Don’t be mad, Gav,” she begs, sounded practically herself–at least, her human self–again. “C’mon, please?”
She curls her legs back around him, brings her clawed hands up to her chin and blinks. Trying to look demure, he supposes, and it’s sort of working. Probably just because of his dick, though.
“You can finish fucking me, if you want,” she offers.
If Gav was a different sort of man, he’d point out that from where he’s sitting, her feelings on the matter aren’t really all that important. He can’t deny that the thought occurs, crawling dark and abhorrent out of the grossest parts of his heart. Just a part of being all the way awake. Now that part of him that thinks he ought to just keep fucking her, whether she likes it or not, it’s awake, too, awake and loud and disgusting.
He wouldn’t do it, he promises himself. He’s still human enough that he wouldn’t.
“Could you turn back into a girl? A human girl?”
Cho preens and trills a weird noise that reads as a realer laugh than any of the chuckles from before.
“Do you not think I’m sexy anymore, Gavin? Are you a ‘take a bitch swimming for the first date’ man?”
“Your, uh, your shell… it seems a little… fragile?”
She scoffs, and folds together. It doesn’t make any physical sense, but that’s just the way of these things. She folds her arms up, tucks her legs in, and the vague suggestion of human limbs in the shadows and markings on her carapace become a concrete human body.
Before she can get her bearings back, Gav pulls her hips up flush against his and gets back into it, his cock aching after so long hard with no real stimulation. Cho squeals, just like she did before, voice sweetly human again.
Her feet flail in the air behind him, unable to get good purchase with the way he rocks her. It’s a cruel, harsh rhythm, one he gives up pretty soon after starting. He’s not here to hurt her. But it’s probably a safe bet to make it clear that he could, if she decides she wants to try the murder thing over.
It wouldn’t work. But it would hurt his feelings pretty bad.
Human fingers, just as viciously curved as the spines of before, fix on his cheeks, nails biting a little even through his beard. Not enough to break the skin. Nothing ever is. But he can appreciate the effort, the naked passion in the gesture.
Now that he’s awake, his mind is a lot clearer. The craziness from before is gone, and he feels like he’s actually appreciating it now. The way her pussy clings tight to his cock, the way she’s soft all over now. When she was a big mantis–and he’s well aware this should be more pressing than it is, but his brain is doing about a third, tops, of his thinking–she was hard and smooth, except inside.
Now he can smell something strange on the air. Something other than the woods, something other than her dripping pussy, his own sweat and pre. Something floral, cloyingly sweet, so thick it practically coats the inside of his nose and tongue. If he can only smell it now… must be some sorta trick she was using to make him lose his mind, lose his common sense.
Ha! He knew he wasn’t normally like this!
Cho beats the small of his back with her heels, eyes burning into his. He can’t press tight like he wants and still maintain eye contact, but he… he doesn’t wanna look away. Not even to watch her tits bounce with every thrust, not even to watch his cock plunging in and out of that hot, snug cunt.
What are you? The question is burning in her thoughts, but just like him, she’d rather fuck than really ask.
They both reach for her clit at the same time, but Gav’s hands are bigger and she’s playing very coy since he figured out she was trying to kill him. She lets him do what he wants. It’s so fat, swollen up nice and firm under the pad of his thumb. Her thighs jerk apart at the first touch, but she gets used to it within a few seconds.
“Nice boy,” she coos, locking her fingers at the back of his neck.
It isn’t long at all before he cums. Who could hold that against him? They’d been pretty well into it before she went all attempted murder on him. The way her pussy twitched against him as he worked her clit, the way her mouth hung open, soft, red, inviting, it was too much. He should really be applauded for holding on as long as he did, in his opinion.
He bottoms out in her, as far as her body will let him go, the pressure of her hips against his balls alleviating the sharpness of every pulse. Cho wails, and it trails from high to low, turns into a moan, because he doesn’t stop playing with her, not even as he’s cumming, feels like he’s shooting his fucking soul out the end of his dick…
Around them, the room rocks as he pulls out, not bothering to be careful about the mess. She’s already soaked his jeans, a little bit of semen ain’t gonna hurt them none. He keeps his hand right where it is, and not more than maybe thirty seconds passes before she thrashes, tosses her head, and grips his sheets with both hands.
He keeps going for a bit longer, because he’s still a little sore about her trying to kill him. He stops when she catches him in the sternum with her foot, though something about the angle tells him she was aiming for his neck.
They’re silent, still staring at each other as they pant for breath. Even the prickle of the zipper against his cock doesn’t make him move. Which one of them is gonna be the first to crack?
Naturally, although he’s definitely the wronged party here, it’s him.
“So, uh, did you plan on killing me from the very start or was it sorta, sorta one of those spur of the moment decisions?” he asks, tucking himself away, sticky as he is.
Cho studies the ceiling, crosses her ankle over her knee.
“Uh, I considered it after coffee, but it was confirmed when you said you had no family or any close friends. And living out in the middle of nowhere? Has anyone ever told you you’re the perfect victim, Gavin?”
Slapping women is rude, so Gav just grits his teeth.
“Nice. So you were just trying to get close to kill me? That’s hurtful, Cho.”
She sits up and gives him a look half pouting, half conciliatory.
“It’s not that you’re not enjoyable company or anything,” she promises. “I did enjoy my time with you! I was even going to keep your skull after you were dead, and that’s a real honor. You know?”
It takes a few seconds for Gav to bring himself back to center after hearing her put that on him so nonchalantly.
“Well, gee, fuckin’ thanks, Cho.”
It’s rude to slap women, Gav reminds himself, undoing his loosened ponytail and fixing it back just to have something to do other than give Cho the backhanding of her life.
“Aw, Gav,” she says, crawling forward. He knows it’s just an act and she probably does it for all sorts of people, but the way she rolls her ass and makes her tits swing as she does really starts him feeling a bit sorrier for her. “It’s nothing personal. We all do what we have to, y’know. Humans kill each other for any old reason, but I had a good reason, I promise!”
“What, gonna lay your eggs in me or something?”
She laughs, not mocking like before, but genuine, joyful. She sits back up, too, no longer putting on a sex kitten act but looking more like the Cho that he rode around town with. The Cho he caught feelings for. Good to know that the Cho he likes isn’t entirely fake.
“Ha, yeah,” she confirms. “You got a lot of beef. Lots of meat for my babies to grow up big and robust in.”
That does it. Gav gets up and goes to take a piss, just so he can stop looking at her. This is crazy. How can she be so casual?! God knows he’s never been this congenial with people he’s tried to kill! She’s got some kind of gall!
Or maybe it’s a cultural thing? She is first-generation, only about a decade out of Busan. Or possibly it’s an insect thing. He’s never dealt with insects on more than a ‘ushering you out of my house with some paper and a glass’ basis.
“You know, you’re just as guilty as me!”
And now she’s following him! God dammit. Still, she turned into a bug while he was railing her. So he’s gonna just keep at it and if she finds that gross she can just go.
“In what way, Cho-rong Park? In what possible way am I anything other than the victim here?”
“You’re not normal,” and though she can’t possibly know it, the jolt still goes through Gav. He looks back down at the toilet and watches himself pee, because he can’t meet her face and staring anywhere else would be too obvious. “If you were, you’d be dead. You deceived me, too!”
“Not for the purpose of murdering you,” he insists.
“I don’t know that.”
“If I wanted to kill you, after you tried to kill me would have been the perfect time.”
“Men and their dicks. Maybe you just wanted to bust the nut before snuffing me out! Being selfish and thinking with your cock, that’d be just typical.”
“I got you off!”
“To get me to drop my guard, maybe! Life is tough for women, we’ve got to be paranoid, y’know?”
“No, Cho-rong, I do not.”
She sits up on the counter, flushes the toilet before he can.
“What are you, Gav?” she asks, naked curiosity on her face.
Gav scratches the back of his neck, tries to find the words to express it without having to get into the nitty-gritty. Details that she won’t understand, more explanation than he’s comfortable giving. Especially to someone he’s only known a week and a half. Especially someone who just admitted to wanting to lay eggs in him.
He settles for, “oh, y’know. Freak of nature. One of them things. It don’t matter.”
Not a satisfactory answer, but she takes it. Stays in the bathroom while he goes to the bed, kicks off his jeans, and lays back. Jesus. Jesus Christ on a fucking bike! You gotta be kidding. Gav thought he was doing a good job keeping his nose out of this sort of stuff.
He patrols his block, keeps things in his neighborhood haunts in order, and other than that, keeps his head down. Weren’t none of his business if it wasn’t in his place, and there’s nothing out here that anybody wants. Nobody important, anyway. Cho is a little bit more than tree sprites and lost, lonely ghosts. Just a touch. Y’know. Not too much.
The mattress dips as she sits down. Her face comes into view, frowning, hair hanging down like waterfalls of ink.
She fidgets, then flops next to him.
“Are we not friends anymore?”
He considers. It’s probably owed more time than he gives it, but he’s tired. Emotionally, physically… this was kinda an ordeal.
“Well, you can’t kill me, so I ain’t scared of you,” he says. “Though you did give me a bit of a spook there. And, well, I mean, I already made reservations for Red Lobster and bought tickets for Fantastic Beasts and everything, so…”
“Yeah, I caved and bought a new THOT dress ‘cause I can’t get my old one over my ass,” Cho agrees. “Economically speaking…”
“Yeah. Yeah, it’s, uh, economically speaking, it makes more sense to stay friends.” Gav swallows, mouth dry before he can even get his confession out. “And, uh, I do, uh, really like you, so–”
Cho grins and boops the end of his nose.
“Ooh! Gavin! You have a crush on me!”
He rolls over, trying very hard not to roll his eyes.
“Yeah, what in tarnation. I’m a real maverick.”
He clicks out his light, pulls the kicked-down quilt up over both of them. After a second or so, Cho snuggles up to his back, drapes her arm over his side as best she can. Cards her thin little fingers through his chest hair, and sighs as she settles in for sleep.
“You down for bacon in the morning?” he asks.
He puts his hand over hers, envelops it entirely. He really does like her. He hopes in the morning he still feels as calm about the whole thing. He doesn’t want to have to chase her off and potentially beat her ass.
“Yeah. Yeah, that sounds good,” she murmurs.
Her lips brush soft against his back, then purse into a few quick kisses. No one he’s ever let spend the night after sex has done that. His heart twists again. Dammit. They don’t make a vaccination for feelings.
He falls asleep. When he doesn’t wake up dead, he makes bacon for both of them. After that, they go out driving, and it’s nice, and Gav decides he’s not that sore about last night after all.
The next day, they go out again. And the day after that. And the day after that.